As we recap the year that was, we can’t go past revisiting the most bogan baby names of 2022. As expected there’s a few that left the nation shamed and shocked.
Each year, Kidspot releases Australia’s top bogan baby names. And 2022’s list is a doozy!
We didn’t think anything could top last year’s horrors, but this year’s list bewildered us with new creative lows as parents ruin children’s names across the nation.
Ready to let us take you for a tour through these monstrosities? Deep breath…
Top girls names
Wow, right from the start we’re lost for words. A nod to Brexit?
Yep, ticks all the boxes for bogan baby name – take a nice name (Ivy), change its spelling and add random letters at the end.
Apparently this is a vape brand. We guess it’s classier than a cigarette brand… but not by much.
Makes us think of cardigan. But apparently it’s a nod to rapper Cardi B. Maybe Cardi B in a cardigan?
When you can’t afford the expensive Dior handbag, you get a cheap knock-off. Just like this name.
Sounds Irish, and Irish names are beautiful. This one just breaks out hearts.
A lot of babies are in fact miracles, but it’s been taken to bogan level by adding an extra c.
Is that the plural of resilient? This kid will certainly need some resilience with this name.
Prediction: this kid will grow up loving to swim and will become vegetarian by 3.
Speaking of fish, this one reminds us of a Salamanda, which is basically a fish with legs. Okay, we see some connection here. But apparently this bogan beauty is a mash-up of Samantha and Amanda.
Top boys names
Well this seems alright. If you take on the quality of your name, then this kid will be fine. Except, Brave is also the name of a Disney Princess. But she’s kick-ass, so yeah, this kid will be fine.
Feels very much Game of Thrones. It’s also character from multiplayer online battle arena video game League of Legends who wields an axe. Maybe they should hang out with Brave.
There’s a German soccer player called Julian Draxler, and having a last name as a first name is common. But still…
Kashdon will always be cashed up, or at least his parents hope he’ll be.
This kid will be growing up in the school of hard knocks.
So sort of a legend but not quite. Sorry son, but remember we still love you.
It’s fun to take a perfectly good name like Max and just add on random letters. Next year, it’ll be Maxoff making the list, you just watch.
We work with a Rory and he’s a lovely guy and we call him Roar as a nickname. He’s fine with that because he never has to write Roar on official documents or answer it when the Barista calls his coffee… possibly with a loud roar.
It’ll be shortened to Zake, then Zed, maybe Zedman. It’s not going to end well.
Girls have been named after semi-precious stones for ages – Ruby, Amber, crystal. But no, boys get named after a mineral. Chemistry class is going to be a hoot!